mostly-funnytwittertweets:

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brucebocchi:

hotvampireadjacent:

“Kill them with kindness.” Of course. Just make sure you do kill them.

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(via theyellowbitchroad)

internetexplorers:

*gets out of bed*

no

*gets back in bed*

(via coolbeaner)

guerrillatech:

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(via lolsomeone-actually)

bob-belcher:

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(via lolsomeone-actually)

leftboob-enthusiast:

date someone you can high five after sex tbh

(via coolbeaner)

happifying-things:

(via wafflehousewarden)

ursie:

ratherembarrassing:

sarcasmsinfinite:

skold:

yr locked in a room alone with three adult men but you feel perfectly safe. who are they

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#the papas mia (@professorspork)

@butchniqabi

(via thelaughingfreckle)

Wow i haven’t been on here in ages and after a scrolling for 30 seconds, I remember why

(via frogmood)

shock:

why must life have a grand purpose? is it not enough to have some basil, and mozzarella?

(via damn-funny)

pricklylegs:

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(via werewolf-bar-mitzvah-spookyscary)

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